AN UNUSUAL LETTER

A letter from a Sardar's mother to her son
  
    My dear Jagjit, I am in a well here and hoping you are also in
    a well there. I'm writing this letter slowly, because
    I know you cannot read fast. We don't live where we
    did when you left home. Your dad read in the newspaper
    that most accidents happen 20 miles from home, so we
    moved 20miles. I won't be able to send the address as
    the last Sardar who stayed here took the house numbers
    with them for their new house so they would not have
    to change their address. Hopefully by next week we
    will be able to take our earlier address plate here,
    and that our address will remain same too.This place
    is really nice. It even has a washing machine,situated
    right above the toilet I'm not sure it works too well.
    Last week I put in 3 shirts, pulled the chain and
    haven't seen them since.

    The weather here isn't too bad. It rained only
    twice last week. The First time it rained for 3 days
    and second time for 4 days.
    The coat you wanted me to send you, your Aunt
    said it would be a little too heavy to send in the
    mail with all the metal buttons, so we cut them off
    and put them in the pocket.

    Your father has another job. He has 500 men
    under him. He is cutting the grass at the cemetery.
    By the way I took Bahu to our club's poolside. The
    manager is Badmash. He told her that two piece
    swimming suit is not allowed in his club. We were
    confused as to which piece should we remove?

    Your sister had a baby this morning. I haven't
    found out whether it is a girl or a boy, so I don't
    know whether you are an Aunt or Uncle.
    Your uncle, Jetinder fell in the nearby well.Some
    men tried to pull him out, but he fought them off
    bravely and drowned.We cremated him and he burned for
    three days.

    Your best friend, Balwinder, is no more. He
    died trying to fulfill his father's last wishes. His
    father had wished to be buried in the sea after he
    died. And your friend died while in the process of
    digging a grave for his father.
    There isn't much more news this time. Nothing much
    has happened.
    Love - Mom.

    P.S. Jagjit, I was going to send you some money but by
    the time I realized, I had already sealed off this
    letter.