Monday, January 29, 2007

Javascript Gimmicks

Gimmick 1: Edit any webpage with any content...

Go to any web page, clear the address bar, paste the following JS code snippet in that and hit enter...

javascript:document.body.contentEditable='true'; document.designMode='on'; void(0);

OoooHoooo!!! you can now edit whatever you want in that page now....

Gimmick 2: Dancing Images

Go to any web page, clear the address bar, and paste this…

javascript:R=0; x1=.1; y1=.05; x2=.25; y2=.24; x3=1.6; y3=.24; x4=300; y4=200; x5=300; y5=200; DI=document.images; DIL=DI.length; function A(){for(i=0; i-DIL; i++){DIS=DI[ i ].style; DIS.position='absolute'; DIS.left=(Math.sin(R*x1+i*x2+x3)*x4+x5)+"px"; DIS.top=(Math.cos(R*y1+i*y2+y3)*y4+y5)+"px"}R++}setInterval('A()',5); void(0);

and hit enter…

And... Here it goes... Enjoy the Image Dance…

Note: If you are in other part of webpage such as scrolled down to the end of page, probably you cannot see the image dancing... so scroll to the top of web page you are currently browsing to see the image dance.

Note: To get out of the mess created by the above, just hit the browser back button and refresh the page.

Modern Morale Stories

A junior manager, a senior manager and their boss are on their way to a meeting.

On their way through a park, they come across a wonder lamp. They rub the lamp and a ghost appears !

The ghost says," Normally, one is granted three wishes but as you are three, I will allow one wish each" So the eager senior manager shouted, I want the first wish. I want to be in the Bahamas, on a fast boat and have no worries.

Pfufffff, and he was gone. Now the junior manager could not keep quiet and shouted "I want to be in Florida with beautiful girls, plenty of food and cocktails."Pfufffff, and he was also gone. The boss calmly said," I want these two idiots back in the office after lunch at 12.35pm"


Morale of the Story : "Always allow the bosses to speak first"



Standing in front of a paper shredding machine with a piece of paper in his hand.

"Listen," said the CEO, "this is a very sensitive and important document, and my secretary has left. Can you make this thing work?" "Certainly," said the young executive. He turned the machine on, inserted the paper, and pressed the start button. "Excellent, excellent!" said the CEO as his paper disappeared inside the shredder machine. "I just need one copy."

Morale of the Story : "Never, never assume that your BOSS knows everything"



An American and a Japanese were sitting on the plane on the way to LA when the American turned to the Japanese and asked, "What kind of -ese are you?" The Japanese confused, replied, "Sorry but I don't understand what you mean." The American repeated, What kind of -ese are you?" Again, the Japanese was confused over the question. The American, now irritated, then yelled, "What kind of -ese are you .. Are you a Chinese, Japanese, Vietnamese!, etc......???" The Japanese then replied, "Oh, I am a Japanese." A while later the Japanese turned to the American and asked: What kind of 'kee' was he. The American, frustrated, yelled, "What do you mean what kind of '-kee' am I?!" The Japanese said, "Are you a Yankee, donkee, or monkee?"

Morale of the Story : "Never insult anyone"



There were these 4 guys, a Russian, a German, an American and a French, who found this small genie bottle. When they rubbed the bottle, a genie appeared. Thankful that the 4 guys had released him out of the bottle, He said, "Next to you all are 4 swimming pools, I will give each of you a wish. When you run towards the pool and jump, you shout what you want the pool of water to become, then your wish will come true." The French wanted to start. He ran towards the pool, jumped and shouted "WINE". The pool immediately changed into a pool of wine. The Frenchman was so happy swimming and drinking from the pool. Next is the Russian's turn, he did the same and shouted, "VODKA" and immersed himself into a pool of vodka. The German was next and he jumped and shouted, "BEER". He was so contented with his beer pool. The last is the American. He was running towards the pool when suddenly he steps on a banana peel. He slipped towards the pool and shouted, SH*T!!!!!!!........."

Morale of the Story : "Think twice before you say something, because sometimes accidents do happen"

Monday, January 22, 2007

Weekend Visit to DT Mall

From Left: Amit, Me, Abhinav and Gaurav


From Left to Right: Amit, Mani, Abhinav and Gaurav

"Backstreet Boys"
Clockwise from 6PM position: Amit, Gaurav, Myself(Rising Star) and Abhinav

DT Theaters
Looks very tidy in contrast to the rainbow colored theater walls('caz of unbearable spitting habit of some people) back home.

Friday, January 19, 2007

2007 New Year Party (Rocking Party)


Gaurav(in red shirt) rocking there in the name of dance

Bad place



a corner at NYX, 32nd Milestone Complex at Gurgaon(our party venue)

Dance floor armed with everything... right from DJ to Drinks

Edits: blue-pencilled some pictures & texts on 8th July 2010 4:02 PM PST. Request code: frfbmk(I know its weird code, I will forgot what it stands for later but still what is life without fun/mystery/confusion)

2007 New Year cum Welcome Party at 32nd Milestone, Gurgaon



Myself

Mani Shanker Goswami and Abhishek Vats


Me and Abhinav

Edits: blue-pencilled some pictures & texts on 8th July 2010 4:00 PM PST. Request code: frfbmk(I know its weird code, I will forgot what it stands for later but still what is life without fun/mystery/confusion)

2007 New Year cum Welcome Party

Parveen and Myself

Myself

Tanuj and Mani Shanker

From left , Gyanandra, Subodh, Amit Kumar, Amit Agnihotri, Ujwal
Amresh and Amit Srivastava are sitting down.

Edits: blue-pencilled some pictures & texts on 8th July 2010 3.55 PM PST. Request code: frfbmk(I know its weird code, I will forgot what it stands for later but still what is life without fun/mystery/confusion)

Thursday, January 04, 2007

Like Fancy Designations? Beware It might have other meanings!!!

Are you the person who always like to be designated with some fancy caption?

Well you may think fancy designation is great and suits well with your position. But have you ever thought what your people down the lanes talk and define a new meaning for that?

Just go through the down the lane definitions of some designations,

Project Manager is a Person who thinks nine Women can deliver a baby in One month.

Marketing Manager is a person who thinks he can deliver a baby even if no man and woman are available.

Onsite Coordinator is one who thinks single Woman can deliver nine babies in one month.

Resource Optimization Team thinks they don't Need a man or woman; they'll produce a child with zero resources.

Quality Auditor is the person who is never happy with the PROCESS to produce a baby.

Documentation Team thinks they don't care whether the child is delivered, they'll just document 9 months.

Developer is a Person who thinks it will take 18 months to deliver a Baby.

Client is the one who doesn't know why he wants a baby.

And finally...

Tester is a person who always tells his wife that this is not the Right baby.


Now back to the same question. "have you ever thought what your people down the lanes talk and define a new meaning for that?"

Probably your answer is NO. Because you have positioned in such a way that your team members are not ready to share their lighter moments with you.
If its the case please evaluate yourself and decide how you would like to be viewed by your people... Else at the end you will be left with just that fancy designation and no love from your so called team members...

Tuesday, January 02, 2007

netAdventist Crossed 30k Mark

Being my most favourite project of all... I always keep track of the google's search result numbers for "netAdventist".

I started doing this when netAdventist was first released to customer usage back in early 2006. The initial page result were just around 7 or 8. Recently today after long time I did the same and im not surprised to see the page results hovering well over 30,000 mark. Commendable growth supported by Gordon Harty whom I consider as my guru, David Burry, John Ash and a wonderful team from India lead by Subash which I was part of it untill few months back.

I wish all the best to netAdventist team to make it a mega success story and front runner in Web 2.0 technology arena.

India's Most Wanted Report

Is it possible to release a report which rates a VIP based on his behavior in public? And most importantly the report about the politicians who are power center of a nation?
Yes it is possible and a country did it by releasing a report about its powerful politicians rate card based on their behavior in power centers. If you think the country is India, probably you are novice about Indian system.

Now checkout the original report,

The Honourable Peter Dunne, New Zealand Member of Parliament of Ohariu-Belmont and leader of the United Future party, has today released a list of the worst-behaved MPs in Parliament for 2006.

Nick Smith, MP for the New Zealand National party, is listed as the worst-behaved on the list. Dunne said: "The winner by a country mile this year is National's Nelson MP, Dr Nick Smith, who is consistently among the worst-behaved MPs."

The list awards one point if Madam Speaker Margaret Wilson asks an MP to retract and apologise for a statement, and three points if he is asked to leave the House.

Smith was first on the list as he had 21 points, six retractions and five for being forced from the House. Smith was placed second equal in 2002, third in 2003, first in 2004 but didn't register on the list last year, 2005.

The Honourable Tau Henare is second with 14 points. He had to retract and apologise for five statements and was asked to leave the house three times.

Gerry Brownlee is ranked third both on the worst behaved list and the National party list. Mr Brownlee had twelve points because he had to retract and apologise for twelve statements. Mr Brownlee appeared on the list in 2004 in second place and in 2005 was placed fourth equal.

The leader of New Zealand First and MP Right Honourable Winston Peters appears on the list this year at fourth place with 11 points, from having to retract two statements and being asked to leave the House three times. Peters has been improving his behaviour every year, appearing on the list in first place in 2002 and 2003, fourth in 2004 and third in 2005.

Honourable Trevor Mallard is fifth place this year with nine points. Six points for having to apologise for a statement and three points for being asked to the leave the House. He appeared third on the list in 2004 and fourth equal in 2005.

Hon Dover Samuels was expelled from the House twice and had to withdraw and apologize for three statements and because of that he is sixth on the list this year.

Recently the deputy leader of National and seventh on the bad MP list is Hon Bill English for six statements requiring retraction, and being expelled from the House once. Dunne described him as a person to watch.

Rodney Hide, leader of the ACT party, didn't appear on the list this year even though he was first place last year. Also Honourable Chris Carter didn't appear on the list, despite placing second last year.


Read those all? Hmmmm... We should definitely have report system like this to keep a check on our politicians and at least it might help educated voters...

Thanks to Wikipedia for this story.

Pride to be Poor!!! Only in Tamilnadu

These days, it seems, the huddled masses are yearning to get free TVs. Declaring color television a basic necessity, an Indian political party promised free sets to the poor and swept to power in May in the southern state of Tamil Nadu. So far, the Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam party, or DMK, has handed out 60,000 sets and plans to give away 30,000 more in coming months.

As far as political platforms go, this one clearly has been a winner.

'I will always vote for DMK,' said Parimala, a 51-year-old widow.

Peeling onions on the bare floor of her tiny 6-by-4-foot living room, her eyes hardly wavered from the soap opera playing at full volume on the 14-inch box adorned with a purple sticker reading: 'Government of Tamil Nadu Color TV 2006.'

An electoral stunt for sure, but one that illustrates how populism has emerged as the default position of parties across India's political spectrum as they contend with the fading of once-dominant ideologies.

Many areas have seen the rise of populism, with politicians offering a mishmash of social programs and other promises to the masses.

But no one has gone as far as Tamil Nadu's DMK. Part of the reason is money: Tamil Nadu is one of India's wealthiest states, giving its government full tax coffers.

'In other states the populism is mainly rhetoric, but in Tamil Nadu they can afford to give out so much,' said Kamal Mitra Chenoy, a political scientist in New Delhi. 'The kind of material benefits to the voters in Tamil Nadu are unprecedented.'

The state's two main political parties _ the DMK and the All India Dravida Munnetra Kazhagam _ face the problem of not being very different from one another.

Both push regional Tamil rights and champion the poor. And both are led by film industry celebrities _ DMK has M. Karunanidhi, a flamboyant former screenwriter; its rival has former Tamil star actress J. Jayalalithaa.

The two parties have traded leadership of the state for three decades, and 'since the battle is so tight they resort to these kind of promises,' Chenoy said.

Thus, the free TVs _ and houses and stoves and whatever else can be used to lure voters.

Parimala's tiny house in Sumathuvapuram, a village on the outskirts of Kanchipuram, a city famed for its temples and silks, is one of about 100 homes built here by DMK for supporters in a key election district after the party came to power in 1996.

DMK was voted out in 2001 but staged a comeback in last May's elections, and now voters like Parimala are eager for the goodies they were promised during the campaign.

'In January, they are giving us gas stoves,' she said with a grin.

Politicians wrap such giveaways in the justifying language of social welfare.

Television, 'nowadays, it is not just entertainment, it is more, it informs about health, politics and public awareness issues,' said DMK's party secretary, T.K.S. Elangovam,

Farm workers could not afford to buy a TV set on the $1.30 a day most earn, he noted. Besides, the sets are no burden to state coffers, bought at bulk for about $60 each, he said.

Not everyone sees the giveaways in such altruistic terms.

'The problem is that the bulk of the money goes to freebies instead of to development,' said S. Viswanathan, editor of Tamil Nadu's Industrial Economist magazine.

Critics also note that relatives of Karunanidhi, the party leader, own the region's main cable company, Sumangali Cable Vision, and the free TVs have helped boost subscriptions.

The cost _ an initial payment of $11 plus a monthly charge of $2.20 _ is steep for the poor, but 30 of the 100 households that got TV sets in this village have signed up.

Perhaps that will provide the party with a new opportunity to make promises.

'Tell the government they must reduce the rate,' said Alamelu, a 35-year-old housewife, waving her TV remote control in the air. 'I had to take out a loan for the deposit.'

Thanks to AP for this story.